Beautiful Girl

There's a gal in my life that I'm so fucking attracted to it hurts. I don't see her as often as I would like, but when I do....man...I just want to walk up to her and kiss her. I can honestly say that I haven't felt this way about someone in a long time...and part of me wants to supress all desire because lurking around the corner is our old friend REJECTION. I'm not afraid of rejection, just tired of it. When you have been rejected as much as I have, you manage to grow accustomed to it. It still stings, but you survive. Maybe I just create reasons to NOT do anything about my lust. I'm a complicated person, a contradiction of sorts. I'm a leader and very outgoing, but also horribly shy and lonely sometimes. I don't think being with someone will make me happy, but at the same time I wonder if it will?