The Jacket is Wacket

The Jacket has it all, Kierra Knightly's naked breasts, Oscar winner Adrian Brody, Kris Kristofferson, Jennifer Jason Leigh...so why did it suck so bad? Maybe because it didn't know what it wanted to be when it grew up? Is it a horror movie, a love story, fantasy? I don't know and I wasted 2 hours seeing it today.

My biggest beef, besides the relegation of Roadhouse's Kelly Lynch to a role that has 2 minutes of screen time, is that despite the talent of the cast, the acting sucks worse than the implausible story. And the whole Kierra Knightly/Adrian Brody story line is just fucking creepy. If you don't know what I'm talking about, let me explain. Adrian Brody is put in the loony bin for killing a cop, even though he didn't do it, Brad Renfro did. In the nuthouse, he is subjected to this weird punishment involving a straight jacket and a morgue tray closet. Follow me? The back story has something to do with shit that happened in Iraq during the first Gulf War, Brody is shot there, gets amnesia and winds up a drifter in 1992??? Still with me? He meets this little girl and her mother on the side of the road and helps them get their truck running. The little girl takes a liking to him in the 3 minutes they spend together on the side of the road. Little while later, Brody hitches a ride with Renfro who kills the cop and frames Brody. Ok. Now in the morgue tray closet while in the jacket, Brody somehow can go into the future and contacts the little girl by the side of the road who is now an adult. Within 3 visits from the past, Brody nails her for no reason that I could see other than to show him LICKING Ms. Knightly's breasts. Talk about an oddly placed scene in a movie. I wasn't expecting it at all, but happy to see it nonetheless. Moving on, the story gets more and more hackneyed until eventually Brody slips on the ice and dies? Roll credits. What the fuck? I have no idea why I saw this hunk of shit.

Hey Adrian! You better start making better choices or I want that Oscar back!